Good grief, this appears to be my first blog entry since April. In my defence, I’ve had a few things to deal with.

As you may know if you’ve been following me on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, there have been yet more shenanigans with my stupid spine. Some problems I’d been having with my neck turned out to be more serious than they first appeared, and I ended up having urgent surgery to free my squished spinal cord.

Of course, given that the NHS is underfunded to the point of collapse, ‘urgent’ doesn’t necessarily mean next week, next month or even this year. When I spoke to the surgeon in April, he said, “this should be done before the end of the summer”; I immediately asked, “which summer?”. Thankfully things did move quickly, and I had the surgery in July.

I won’t go into detail (although I’m very happy to chat to anyone who is interested or going through something similar) but I ended up having a multi-level laminoplasty and foraminotomy, which was… not fun. In fact, it was spectacularly painful and I was stuck in a neck brace until my ‘six week’ post op appointment at the hospital, which actually happened after seven weeks just for the sheer fun of it. I am now sporting a new neck-length Frankenstein’s monster scar right on time for Halloween. Should have just gone all out and given me bolts.

Yes, I was properly grumpy but look at the actual state of me:

On the bright side, I’m glad it’s over and everybody at the RJAH in Oswestry was lovely as usual. Recovering from this one has been tough and frustratingly slow, but I can confirm that I am now able to put on my own socks, drink coffee (or, let’s be honest, wine) without a straw and sit at my desk long enough to type a few paragraphs at a time. Sketching comfortably is a little way off, but I’m confident I’ll get there soon.

Obviously, I haven’t been having many other adventures lately. Before my neck intervened, Luce and I had been hard at work on our somewhat neglected garden. We managed to sort out the weed covered patio, clear the paths and flower beds nearest the house and do some replanting, which was quite the achievement! My mum bought me a small greenhouse for my birthday last year, so I was able to grow (or attempt to grow) pretty much everything from seed this spring. Some experiments were more successful than others, but I really enjoyed myself and I’m already planning for next year.

As a joint birthday present/reward, we decided to upgrade our outdoor drinking experience a little… 

Yep, that’s me on my birthday in June sipping rum cocktails at our ACTUAL TIKI BAR! What could possibly go wrong? We’ve acquired solar disco lights and several flamingos since then, which has rendered the whole thing approximately 35% more hilarious. And that’s two photos of me, which is more selfies than I’ve shared in ages (February 2020. I checked).

Speaking of hilarity, we finally had to have our ancient gas boiler replaced in June. We’d been putting it off for ages, mostly because of the expense but also the upheaval. Our crumbling Victorian house never makes anything like this straightforward. Sure enough, leaks sprung up all over the ancient pipework and it became obvious that we were also going to have to replace most of the ancient radiators, so the upheaval extended through the whole place, and we now have an efficient new central heating system with six-inch sections of peeling 1970s wallpaper above several of the radiators because the new ones were a different size. Goodness only knows when I’ll be able to get up a ladder to hang wallpaper. I might just have to style it out for now and call it a feature. Old wallpaper is ‘retro chic’, right? Maybe I’ll start a trend. Also, although we now have a working thermostat for the first time in twenty-odd years, we still feel the dog’s ears to decide whether it’s cold enough to turn the heating on. Because nobody wants cold ears, especially not this dog:

Now you know why I’m skint, perhaps you’d like to have a look at all the lovely t-shirts, posters, mugs etc. in my shiny new online shop? After the customary amount of coffee and swearing, I’ve added a spooky seasonal section and everything. Please order soon if you need stuff in time for Halloween, as everything is made to order and delivered direct by the printer, not the ‘weasel.

I will try and be a more regular correspondent from now on. I know I’ve said that before but this is the first time since 2015 I’m not on a surgeon’s waiting list, which is encouraging. Fingers crossed, eh?

Bonus Music Video

Ok, I admit the title of this blog entry is a bit tenuous. Is it because I talked a bit about gardening? Am I a flower trying to turn towards the sun? Or was it just a flimsy excuse to share this beautiful song at the end?

Yeah… it’s the last one, obviously. But you’ll thank me once you listen to it.

Honestly, I don’t know why I bother making plans any more…

As the nights draw in, a chill in the air and a blaze of autumn colour usually heralds my annual failure to complete Inktober because I’m not necessarily in love with the prompts and I’m easily bored. This year, still a bit giddy after completing the 100 Day Project, I decided to make things more interesting/challenging for myself by attempting a #Halloweaselchallenge to do an animal themed drawing every day, using two prompts from Inktober, Drawloween and Handcrafted Uniquely, a fabulous community of artists on Facebook.

It was all going brilliantly. It really was. Look! Here are some drawings I did and the prompts I used:

Then we noticed that a worryingly firm lump had appeared on one side of Lola’s belly, and the rest of October was all about fixing a wonky dog.

To put this into context, we rehomed Lola and her sister Ruby in 2019 after they lost their owner and ended up in rescue. It soon became obvious that, although they had clearly been loved to bits, they both had some health issues. Despite doing everything we possibly could to save her, we lost poor Ruby to ‘leaky gut syndrome’ in December 2020. In 2018 we lost our beautiful Lab/Collie boy, Boswell, very suddenly, to kidney cancer. They were both just shy of ten years old. Lola turns ten in February.

Long, panicky story short, we whisked her to the vet for a scan and she came back minus her spleen and 1.6kgs of tumour. Here she is getting vetty snuggles, and wondering what the flip heck happened:

” Excuse me? I only came here for a bit of fuss and a gravy bone”…

Thankfully, tests confirmed the tumour was benign and she’s absolutely fine now. Once again, I cannot say enough nice things about our wonderful vet, ‘Auntie Sarah'(!), at Tern Vets in Market Drayton. She has looked after all our dogs with exceptional care and compassion since we moved here and we are very, VERY grateful to her.

Lola has made an amazing recovery and clearly feels much better for getting rid of the extra cargo. We noticed her belly was quite round and very firm when we first adopted her, but she has never shown any symptoms even when examined at the vet. I’m just glad we caught this before it caused anything catastrophic. The X ray she had prior to surgery also showed the start of some degeneration in her spine, so we’ll be looking after that too.

Tanky Dog don’t care though. She is living her best life and as long as she’s happy, that’s all that matters.

It’s November now and I have No Plans Whatsoever. Fool me once, and so on. Let’s just wing the rest of 2021 from here.

Bonus Music Video

‘Time of the Season’ was originally recorded by The Zombies, but I love this cover by Tanya Donelly.

WhooOOoooOOOOoooooh… it’s nearly Halloween!

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In case you hadn’t noticed, I absolutely love Halloween. I was an only child but my parents were great sports, letting me and my friends decorate the house, dress up and make the kitchen look like a tractor accident at a pumpkin farm.

Not being American (and growing up in a part of South London where knocking on strangers’ doors demanding sweeties would guarantee you some free ‘life advice’ and a clip round the earhole) I never went in for Trick or Treating. Apart from the odd year when someone threw a party my Halloween was all about staying up late and watching scary films.

Nothing has changed much as I’ve got older, except that it tends to be at least a Halloweekend now. We have a tradition of inviting friends round for a nice meal which sometimes involves costumes and inevitably becomes hilarious but for Luce and I there will always be a few nights of beer, snacks and horror films while the house looks like a poorly constructed 1970s ghost train. Luce is *great* value watching horror films. Jump scares could have been invented with her in mind.

Speaking of which… BOO! It’s a scary Labrador! …*ahem*…

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I also have a tradition of carving pumpkins. A few years ago, I had a go at the kind of pumpkins that people make with intricate stencils and fancy tools. I just sketch the design on freehand with a pen, then use a kitchen knife, a spoon, a scalpel and a couple of old lino cutters. I’m so high tech. Here are a few of my favourites:

Happily, I really like pumpkin soup. I’ve carved so many now that my main problem is thinking up new ideas. All suggestions gratefully received!

Our dogs also love Halloween because it often involves their favourite aunties visiting and bringing them sausages and people dropping food on the floor after one too many glasses of Vino Collapseau. They do *not* do costumes though. Sandie (pictured above) would happily wear anything in anticipation of a sausage. Etty and Boswell will tolerate the occasional hat but only for the few seconds it takes them to consider they have earned a treat. And forget taking photos, because you get these faces…

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If I want to see how adorable they would look dressed up as, say, Dracula and the Bride of Frankenstein, I make a model. Like this.

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All my Halloween models (and lots of others!) are available on my website So what are your Halloween traditions? Got any good recipes? Pumpkin carving ideas? Horror film suggestions? Let me know!